The above three words fill our hearts with a novel enthusiasm. Every year on Jan. 1, We welcome the upcoming year with lots of celebrations and good deeds along with some resolutions to be followed throughout the year. But, the fact is; these resolutions don’t accompany us for more than 10-15 days. Actually,We make so typical resolutions that it becomes almost and finally impossible to carry on. After 2-3 days’ guilt of the unaccomplished promises that we made to ourselves in the form of resolutions; we start enjoying our days like the previous year.

The forthcoming year adds more joy and a sense of rejuvenation in our hearts. On this day ,we enlarge our hearts and forgive each other,we donate to our heart’s content,We don’t annoy anyone,We don’t display any ill-feeling even towards the most hated person of the last year. Why can’t we practice this the whole year?

“Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.”

Brian Tracy

In my viewpoint,We should celebrate each day like a new year day . We should paint the town red each day . We should devoid our hearts with all the evil emotions and spread love and fraternity the whole year . Each day of the year is special and We should celebrate every moment of all days and strive hard to reach our goal and to live life in a positive way.

In order to avoid the regret of unfulfilment of our resolutions , I suggest to take small resolutions divided in steps . For example , If we want to lose our weight ; instead of taking resolution of losing 30 kg in a year , we should take resolution to develop the habit of rising half an hour earlier than usual , and exercise with a mild diet plan ; instead of following a strict diet chart with a laborious exercise schedule . These small changes will definitely bring change in our body weight with the passage of time. If not as fast as our resolution , believe me it will bring permanent change in our life style. So, we should not make so difficult promises to ourselves that seem to be impossible , and try to achieve small goals that are easy to attain . Every completed step fills us with more zeal to head towards the next step . In short , simply enjoy each moment of each day instead of making our lives tedious, complicated and monotonous as nothing is going to change ,unless we try . HAPPY NEW YEAR ONCE AGAIN!

Since my childhood, I have always been an early riser. I remember well when and how did this habit develope in me. It so happened that I had been in my class 2 when I went to sleep at 5 in the evening and woke up at 5 next morning. Although I slept for 12 long hours but, when I woke up early by I hour than my usual days; I felt a great happiness and enthusiasm.

On that day,I was early in everything. I went for a walk with my father and played with the children in park. When we returned, I found that I had enough time to get myself prepared for the school. I got ready for the school before time and that too without hassle. I recalled my lesson and went to school. I felt fresh for the whole day. I realized a kind of energy reeling in my mind that kept me active. I firmly made a determination that from today onwards,I will wake up early no matter at what time I go to bed.

By waking up early, we can perform number of activities that we find difficult to perform on a regular basis. We can exercise and maintain our health. We can go for a walk and witness the wonderful site of rising sun,birds chirping and twittering in the unknown sky. We can inculcate the habit of reading beautiful books, playing guitar,plan our day; and believe me you will spend your day the way you have planned. And this is such a bodacious feeling that can’t be expressed. Just imagine, you are the master of your day, your time! Everything will be managed exactly what you have aspired for so far. You can plan for your future and you will become What you want. And what not?

There is nothing that remains unreachable. You can work upon your weaknesses and hone your skills. By developing this habit,you can observe those things closely that you ignore everyday in a hurry to reach your workplace.

The most beautiful aspect of early rising is that you witness all the happenings of the day as if life is starting before your eyes. Just think once! You are beholding the creation!

You must have heard people complaining that they don’t have sufficient time to spend with their families,to enjoy their work or to live their passion. What is the use of such monotonous life? Have you ever thought that all the successful and great people were also given 24 hours per day just like you are given. And they have accomplished all those acts of kindness and greatness only in their allotted time, then why can’t you,my friends??? The difference lies within their style of working and time management. If you wake up at 8 in the morning and you have to reach office at 9, what will you do except rushing for your workplace! But if you wake up at 5 or 6 in the morning, you can work to make your future better, you can plan your strategies well to accelerate your growth. And to achieve all these things, what you have to do is just to put the habit of early rising into practice. If you rise timely,you will grow early. I don’t say that late risers don’t grow, but they don’t grow as fast as the early risers. So, give your day a positive start by rising before time. Organise your day judiciously and enjoy your life to its fullest.

Yes! Life is beautiful. Life gives us many reasons to smile.God has created everything and everyone beautiful. What we need is to have the sight to see the beauty in everything. The chirping and singing of birds,the red sky in the morning,the rising and setting sun, children playing and running, people doing laughing exercise in parks, flowers smiling at each other or whatever you see around you is beautiful. The most beautiful thing of the day is that every morning we get brand new 24 hours. The new morning inspires us to earn success. For an animal other than humans, success is to feed itself properly and survive . Their whole day is a race for food and survival. For humans, success is not only to fill stomach,but to give wings to their dreams and reach the zenith.

Life is beautiful as no one wants to leave this earth. Even the person lying on death- bed or suffering from long illness aspires to live. We can increase this beauty by spreading happiness. To spread happiness,you do not need money. Your smile can make the day of a beggar,your neighbour or your colleagues. Smile has reciprocative property. If you smile at a child or a sad person,he or she will supply you immediately with a broader smile than that of yours. Here, the condition is that your smile should be natural,pure and without any adulteration or malice.

Feelings behind any gesture play the pivotal role in spreading happiness. Anything given with disgust will not bring any grace or happiness at the either end. If you yourself are dissatisfied with your life, how can you show true smile and motivate someone to bring happiness in someone’s life? As they say ‘charity begins from home’ ; I say ‘ Happiness comes from within’. We need to work upon ourselves in this direction. In this short span of my life, I have realized that contentment is the key to happiness. If you are not content, millions or trillions of dollars cannot make you happy. And if you are content, all the treasures are not more than heaps of ashes. Being content does not mean to lie dormant or not to strife for achievements, but to keep ourselves free from all sorts of egos and materialistic achievements. We should be empathetic and try to feel the similarities between the smiles and cries of us all. Only then, our life will become beautiful in true sense and will add excellence to the beauty of life.

Last Sunday, I went to see my physiotherapist. I had pain in my right elbow. He examined and told me that I had Tennis elbow. This is a stress injury caused by the overuse of elbow muscles. I met a girl of 10 years named Heena there. I am fond of interacting with everyone especially children. I found her very charming, pleasing, straight forward and quick witted. She studies in class 5. Unfortunately,she is suffering from hemiplegia disorder i.e., left- side paralysis which is related to motor skills and balancing. The doctor is well acquainted with me and knows me as a parenting counsellor. He was perturbed to see the condition of the child because there was not a remarkable improvement in Heena even after 7 years of his treatment. I myself have seen no. of patients recovering permanently and owing him a lot of thanks. He urged me to converse with and counsel the parents. I was astonished to find what I observed. Oh my God! They both were brushing aside their responsibility of rearing the child. The father was highly egoistic and was not ready to transform himself. When I tried to talk to and counsel them, they started playing blame game accusing each other of being uncooperative and irresponsible.

Here, I want to mention that they belong to a well-to-do family. They were ready to spend money,but not to understand that their child needs their support and attention. The father is highly educated linguist and pursuing his P.hd. The mother is a housewife. I was amazed to find that they both had their own reasons for being irresponsible. The father doesn’t have much time as he has to work outside to earn bread and butter while the mother is not able to handle the child politely and lovingly. She doesn’t have patience to the extent their child requires. I don’t know why do these people have kids!!!

They simply entrust the whole responsibility on the doctor and live peacefully; placating themselves that they are spending money on their child’s treatment with the best facilities of the town. I was flabbergasted to see their normal endeavour towards their child’s disorder. Due to their reckless behaviour,they have lost their child’s trust that can never be recovered. What a great loss,but not in their view!!!

l couldn’t have a peaceful sleep till then as Heena can recover permanently with a little dedication, medication, attention and exercises.I simply can’t understand how can parents be so thoughtless and careless! They think that their child needs treatment whereas the truth is such parents need counselling treatment.Actually, this is our natural behaviour either to be caring or reckless. A caring person cares for everyone. Delinquent and neglectful conduct leads to unreliability. I am not opposing his father’s pursuing p.hd; everyone should aspire and try to reach zenith; but we have to fulfil our family responsibilities also. I was surprised to see the mother; she was so comfortable and at ease because she simply considers that only her visit to the doctor will suffice for her daughter’s treatment on her part. She takes it as a routine; not as a serious matter that should bring some outcome. Her smile was killing me inside. She was so relaxed that it hardly matters her if her child doesn’t perform the exercises prescribed by the practitioner.

How pretty and innocent is Heena! She deserves to live a normal life ( physically, mentally, emotionally and of course independently).Here, what troubles me is where does this ease come from? How can we be so cold and frigid to neglect the physical disorder and run away from our responsibilities? I really feel sorry for such people. They are in a great need of learning humanity.

Continue reading “Being Human”

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I simply don’t understand why do the female community has to tolerate all the torments in the forms of rape, molestation,acid attacks, domestic violence, trafficking and many other such physical and mental harassments? Why can’t a girl live her life on her own terms, in her own way and style? All the campaigns on woman empowerment,gender equality,Me Too fail when we hear shocking news of rapes and other assaults. Here, I will not talk about the physical and mental abuse that a lady has to undergo after such assault as much has been said already about this. My motto is to talk about the mentality of a rapist, police,court, politicians, society and family. From where does this heinous mentality beget? I am a psychologist and I have seen such mentality not only in a school boy, but also in an old man of 80 years. And it is not so that these people don’t have families,instead they have happier families than normal people. They have sisters,mother,aunts at home. In the presence of their family,they behave quite normal and even as a naive, but they are knave at heart. Here, I don’t mean that every simpleton has a double personality. I mean to say that every criminal mind wears a dual personality. The reports say that every 3rd man is suffering from some mental illness.In some of them ,this illness reaches up to such a great extent that they become animal at heart. In such cases, they become so cruel that the cries of the victim have no effect on them and they continue with their animosity.

Such people can’t be treated and they don’t deserve to live. If such cases come to light, their wives too support them either due to their blind faith in that dual personality or because of their fear of shattering of their own & children’s life. It is also noticeable that even police don’t get ready to file an FIR on the first instance. They don’t want to register more cases to show that their territory is peaceful and crime rate is quite low.In addition to this,they don’t consider these matters as important, serious and immediate as they actually are. If we talk about court, our judiciary system allows them sufficient time to hire lawyers and file petition against the decision. I don’t know why can’t such criminals be hanged within 3-4 days of the assault after physical examination.Do these criminals deserve to have human rights? The person who has devastated an innocent life,why should he enjoy human rights? On the other hand,some of the politicians comment adversely picking holes in the victim. They mudsling at the victim and her family to dissolve the matter or to raise their vote bank. I want to know, do these people deserve to be our leaders? Instead,they should help the victim. Of course,with the due course of time,our society has changed.people come to support the victim. But only candle march ,oppose, protests or laws like Nirbhaya are not enough. On the spot decision is mandatory. There should be no escape for the criminal.Crime rate can’t be decreased until the criminal has the fear of punishment.why does the punishment linger on till years? I want to ask,at this time,where do the human rights of the victim go? Doesn’t she has the right to live respectfully? No man agrees to marry her,why?They think as if she has lost her dignity forever. They should understand that her soul can’t be raped!!! In many cases, I have seen that family members of the victim don’t register a case in order to suppress the issue. They think,in this way nobody would come to know about their mishappening and they would lead a normal life. But, they should muster courage and protest against the molester so that no girl is molested again! We all should try to help her lead a normal life as nobody and nothing can take her right to live her life with respect and that was not her fault, let bygones be bygones, tear that one page of her life and make her life book worth reading!